Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself; in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: “There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.”
— Mark Twain, in “Chapters from My Autobiography” (1906)
While I’m struggling trying to edit an upcoming mega-post, I thought I would offer a lighter one. You know how WordPress loves to entertain us with blog stats. I thought a little about reducing other aspects of my life to those kinds of numbers.
Non-Volunteer, Paying Jobs (More than 2 weeks Duration) Held: 20
Jobs in the Arts: 5
Healthcare Work: 3
Sales, Manual Labor, Brainless etc: 12
Graduated from: 5
Trade Schools: 4
I tried 3 Universities, but ran out of money each time.
Addresses Lived At Long Enough to Receive Mail: 20
Cities and Towns: 12
Lovers (More than Once): 8
Friends: (Census & subcategories still in progress.)
Pets Owned: 15
The fish, frogs, hamsters, gerbils, and ferret belonged to others in residence.
Vehicles Owned: 21
Human Body: 1
Wagons don’t count, and I never owned skates, blades or a skateboard.
Lowest Price of Gasoline Since I’ve Been Driving: $.22/Gal.
Musical Instruments Owned: 23
Drum Sets: 1
Not counting misc. percussion. The dulcimer is Mary’s.
Foreign Countries Visited: 8
I’m way behind my wife, who had visited more than 20 before we met.
Foreign Cuisines I Have Eaten: 20
My favorites are all Asian.
Languages I Have Sung In Besides English: 8
German and French are a breeze compared to Hebrew and Welsh.
Political Parties whose Candidates I Have Voted For: 4
Though often I’m actually voting against…
Times I’ve Been Called For Jury Duty: 36
Juries I Have Served On: 2
They don’t like having you on a case if you read books and newspapers or have graduated from a college, let alone 5 colleges.